Gasping for Breath
by sadlonelylittlegirl
Summary: After the betrayal of her husband and best friend, Xion is sent to an asylum, where she goes through the process of healing. There she continues to have nightmares of the event that descended her into madness... and commit the sin of murder... A/N: Might make it into a small series of small chapters
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** _I'm still not certain if this will be a simple one-shot or if I'll make it into a small series. Will be turned into a comic as well that I will post in DA. Enjoy~_

* * *

The pen clicks. She could hear her tapping the tip on the clipboard. She heard the ticking sound of the clock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. She counted the seconds that passed as she sits on the sofa, holding her legs close to her chest, staring at her toes as if she would find the answers she sought there.

"You didn't sleep again, did you, Xion?" _Xion_. Yes, that was her name. Gale Sterling – her therapist – is the only person that treated her like a person. Like the girl she had once been. Not a subject like the rest of the doctors treat their patients.

"No…" she answered after a while. It was so obvious though, the dark marks under her eyes were the sign of that. She began counting her toes under her breath.

Gale scribbles something. "Tell me, have you been having that nightmare again?" That question again. Though Gale already knew the answer, she asked. Xion was glad she did. It made her feel like she mattered. Like she wasn't a nobody.

"Constantly…" Gale didn't speak. She knew there was more. Xion kept staring at her feet. "I close my eyes… and I see it all over again. I see the horrifying detail and hear it. I wasn't there… but the nightmares make me feel like I was."

Gale started writing again. She always did, as if the story was new, as if she has never heard it before. But it was comforting. The sounds of the pen as it scribbles reminded Xion she was not there, that it is nothing but a nightmare.

"It's that day again…"

"What are you doing?"

"Heading home. I bought everything I needed to make the special dinner I had planned. I walk in the house. It's all so… normal and comforting." She was silent again. Gale waited. "I hear something. I head towards the sound. The closer I get, the louder it gets. It sounds like… someone's in pain but it's a familiar kind of sound."

Gale stopped writing and looks at Xion. Her body was shivering, as it always did when she got to the worse part of the story. The part that always broke her heart, the part that drove her to this kind of madness.

Xion swallowed hard. "It was coming from the bedroom. My heart sank… I knew what the sounds were, but I refused to believe it. There was no way those sounds could come from there… That was a place only _he_ and I…" She trailed off, shivering. She heard the pen again, comforting her and reminding her about the reality she was in. "I opened the door. It was… It was them. It was horrible. I close my eyes and… I see it over and over! I hear her saying his name over and over again, gasping for air, I see the pain mixed with pleasure on her face! He looks at me, but… but all he does is smile! All he does is smile at me, sadistically. That look in his eyes! The kind of look like saying 'Watch. Don't look away and watch how I humiliate you! Watch as I make her scream! Watch! Watch!'" She began to twitch a bit and Gale begins scribbling again, calming her down a bit. Tears form in her eyes as she forces herself to say the word "Sex". Gale looks at her as she says it in a whisper. "They… were having sex. He… was having sex with my best friend… on our bed and smiling at me, humiliating me…"

The doctor spoke, "But it did not happen in your house. It did not happen in the bed you shared with him." Something she always told her to help her a bit, to pull her away from that thought.

Xion shook her head. "It might as well have happened…" She bit her bottom lip, hugging her legs tighter. "He slept with her. He slept with her. When… When he should have been with me." Everything was silent again. It was almost as if everything had stopped for a moment and she continued "He should've been with me… He should've been with me! With me! It was our anniversary! It was our anniversary!" she cried out and slammed her hands on the couch. "It was our anniversary!" she repeated and kept slamming her hands down.

Gale quickly rushed to her side. "Shh. Shh. Xion, calm down." The raven-haired girl kept shouting as the doctor tried calming her down. She quickly rushes over to turn something on and a tune begins to play. As the tune slowly begins to sink in, Xion's shouting slowly turns to whispering cries as she got in a fetal position. The melody of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata plays in the background, calming her mind. Gale takes her seat again and watches in silence as Xion sobs, letting her frustration out in tears.

"You killed her…" It wasn't a question. It was known very well.

Xion sniffed and stayed in the fetal position. "She wanted to gasp for air… Well, I left her wanting more than just a gasp… I gave her a reason to want to cling to the very thing that keeps us alive. To want to cling to the bits of air, the bits of life she had left. And all I did… was smile." She formed a quivering smile. "I… I said to her, 'Is that the sound you made… when my husband touched you? Is that the sound you made when my husband entered you? Is that the sound you made, you fucking whore?!'" She screamed at the top of her lungs, but Gale stayed in her seat, watching her and scribbling again. Xion frowns. "She gasps, she screams, she cries. But all I do is laugh. All I do is remind her about the pleasures she had that night and that she'll never have again! I told her… I told her 'Why don't you beg? Why don't you plead for more like you did that night, you bitch?!' And I asked all this, I asked all this as I stabbed her with the knife! I was tired of playing; I was tired of only scratching her skin. No! I needed to hear her cry! I needed to hear her beg me to let her live! To apologize for the sin she committed!" She manages to calm down. She slowly sits up, staring blankly in front of her. "She did."

"But you did not stop…"

She slowly shakes her head. "No. I killed her." There was no remorse in her voice. No joy, but no sadness or regret either. "I said to her stilled body… I said… 'The sinful act that cannot be forgiven, even with your life… For the damage you caused, was greater than your pathetic life was ever worth…'" Everything was silent again as the melody kept playing. "And I sat there, knife in hand. Humming, smiling and humming, as she gasped for her very last breath…" She grinned. "Her very… last… breath…"

Gale begins to scribble again as the melody comes to its end.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** _Decided to make it into a small story. This part took the longest because when I started it I was filled with anger and disgust. So to try and keep the same dark atmosphere I only work on it when I'm feeling angry. This chapter was mainly to take out my anger on Namine since she's pretty much the reason I was so angry when I started the fic. Anyway, sorry this one isn't as good as the first part. But enjoy~_

* * *

The doctor sighs as she stares at the scribbles on her notepad. She had already written everything Xion had said before. She had noticed how it seemed to help her calm down at times when she would scribble down. She puts away the notepad and grabs a recorder. She takes a seat on her chair and clears her throat.

"July 10th, 3 in the afternoon. Doctor Gale Sterling, therapist to patient 081314, named Xion Hamasaki. It has been 7 days since the patient was convicted for the murder of Naminé Minami. Diagnosed to have a mental disorder – schizophrenia, she has been brought to this psychiatric institution for medical treatment…"

-Room 132-

Xion sits on the floor as she normally did. The cold cement floor made her remember what it means to have a feeling, even if it was just a physical one. As she always did, she counted her toes under her breath.

"Seashells!"

She stops counting, but keeps her gaze on her feet as someone passes by her and lies on the bed. She hears her turning and can feel her gaze on her.

"We spoke again… about that event…" Xion spoke, knowing she was going to ask – as she always did. She had no idea why this patient has taken an interest in her. Maybe it was pity or maybe she just wanted to humiliate her. Either way, it felt nice having someone always coming to see her.

The woman nods and smirks. "About how you killed your husband's slut?" Xion nods. "Did you tell her about how you taunted the whore?" She nods again. "I like that story."

Xion tightens her grip on her legs. "At that moment… it was like I wasn't there or like it wasn't even me. It's weird. Like I was sleeping… It all felt like a dream, but it felt so real at the same time. I felt like I wasn't even in control."

* * *

 _She gently hummed a tune and came to a stop when she heard soft groans. She smiled as she kept staring at her knife._

 _"Well, it's a about time you woke up…"_

 _The blonde shook her head as she looked around at the run-down place she was in and looked over at the person that stood not very far from her. "X-Xion…?"_

 _Xion turned to face her 'friend', a smile pasted on her face. "Naminé…" The blonde took notice of the knife in Xion's hand and looked back at the raven-haired girl. "Oh? You noticed this little friend of mine… Yes."_

 _"W-What's going on…? Where are we? And… what are you going to do…?!"_

 _The raven-haired woman sighed as she walked over to the worried blonde. "Let me make one thing clear here, Naminé…" She knelt before her and reached out, grabbing her by her golden hair, making her yelp in pain. "I'll be the one asking the questions around here!" She pushed the whimpering woman to the ground as she stood back up, her knife in hand and ready as she walked around and studied Naminé. "Answer me this first; do you think a good person will betray her best friend?"_

 _She rubbed her head as she looked up at Xion, noticing a glint of insanity in her cerulean orbs. "W-What do you me…?!" She screamed as she felt the sharp pain as the knife scratched her arm and she stared at her assailant, her eyes trembled._

 _Xion glared at her. "I told you I would ask the questions here! What part of that didn't you understand?!"_

 _"You're crazy!" Naminé shouted as she held her wounded arm._

 _Xion backed away and smirked. "Hmm… Yes, you're right. I'm crazy. But you know what? You made me crazy." She went ahead and scratched Naminé's leg and heard her cry in pain. She walked around her and knelt behind her, wrapped an arm around her neck and held the knife very close to her. "Are those tears of pain?" Her smile faded and her expression became dark. "Or of pleasure…?" She pulled the knife down, scraping it against her skin._

 _Naminé cried out "S-Stop! It hurts!"_

 _Her eyes widened as she growled and pushed her to the floor and pinned her down. She held the knife above her head. "Is that what you said…?" She giggled a bit and brought down the knife, gently scraping it against her skin and heard her whimper, felt her body quiver. "Is that the sound you made when my husband touched you…?"_

 _At that question, Naminé's eyes widened and she kept her gaze on Xion's eyes. "I… I don't…"_

 _Xion scratched Naminé's arm twice. The blonde screamed, the pain was sharper than the last ones. She could feel the blood flowed from the fresh-made wounds. "Don't. Act. Stupid." She got off her and reached out, grabbed a hold of her golden strands and pulled her a bit, making her scream more. She threw her hard on the floor, her head hit the cement hard and it made her almost black out._

 _"X-Xion… I-I don't…"_

 _Xion scratched Naminé's side. Another scream as the girl fell to the floor and held her side. "I know all about the affair. I know all about… that day..." Naminé remained quiet. Xion looked at her. "Answer me this; do you know what June 20th is?"_

 _"What does it…?" Xion's pupils dilated. She was about to scratch her again but Naminé shouted quickly "It's your anniversary! It's your anniversary!" She backed away a bit; tears flowed down her dirty and scratched face._

 _A crazy smile was pasted on Xion's face as she nodded. "Very good…" She walked around the blonde again. "But… I don't think I have to say much, do I?" The room was silent and Xion felt her heart sinking, her hand clutched tightly on the handle of her knife._

 _"Xion…"_

 _"Shut up, skank!" Xion screamed as she glared at her. "That day he was supposed to be with me! It was our anniversary! It was our anniversary!" she cried out. She felt her mind snapping again. "But instead… he was with you…"_

 _Naminé kept her eyes on Xion's crazed cerulean ones. She was shaking in fear. "You lost your mind."_

 _The raven-haired woman shook her head. "No… I lost my heart…" With that said she stabbed Naminé on the shoulder, hearing her cry out, blood flowed down her arm. "Does it feel good?!" she questioned as she moved the knife a bit, making her gasp in pain. "Is that the sound you made when my husband entered you? Is that the sound you made, you fucking whore?!" she shouted as she pulled the knife and scratched her arms, making her scream. Xion pulled her by her hair and pushed her on the floor. She watched as she crawled a bit, struggling to get up. She walked over to her and grabbed her by the arm; she didn't care about the blood. "Why don't you beg? Why don't you plead for more like you did that night, you bitch?!" She went ahead and scratched her cheek and her arms again. She enjoyed the sounds of pain._

 _After a while, Naminé was breathing heavily. Her face stained with tears and blood. Her usually bright blonde hair a dirty dull color now. Her white dress stained with blood and her vision now a blur from the blood loss. Xion could tell she was slowly dying and it pleased her to see how she cringed in agony. But she grew bored of watching her doing nothing but sit in the corner, gasping for air. She grabbed her knife and walked over to her. "You know… I really did love you Naminé. You and I, we were like sisters." She felt the tears starting to form in her eyes again. "I love him…" She nodded. "Pathetic isn't it? I still love him despite what he did with you on that day… on that day that meant everything to me…"_

 _"X-Xion… I-I…" Her voice was hoarse and her eyes slowly started becoming lifeless. "I'm… I'm s…sorry…" Xion gritted her teeth as she brought down the knife on Naminé's stomach and she gurgled a gasp._

 _The raven-haired woman shrugged as she stared at her. "The sinful act that cannot be forgiven, even with your life… For the damage you caused, was greater than your pathetic life was ever worth…" Slowly she pulled out the knife and sat down as she watched Naminé. As she watched her gasping for breath she slowly hummed the tune she had been humming earlier, a small smile on her face._

* * *

Everything is quiet. Xion wasn't sure if it was a reminder of her recurring nightmares or a memory. It was one of the reasons she was led into insanity.

The familiar voice brought her back to reality. "You know what I would've done." She looks over at the woman that is lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling. "I would've made the bastard watch. I would've made him watch as I took the life of his whore, showing him that he will never again feel the pleasures of a sin he had committed…"

Xion looks down at her feet again. "Roxas…" Every moment she remembers him, she can't help but think about the horrible nightmare and her heart fills with anger and hatred. A smile curves on her pretty face. "I made sure he suffered as well… It's a shame though that I couldn't finish the job…"

"Mmm. Yes. Though you would have if you have done things the way I would have…"

"Um…" The woman looks over at Xion when she hears her. The raven-haired woman looks at her, smiling. "Tell me that story again."

The woman grins.


End file.
